In other news, we discovered that our closet shelving unit was not bracketed or mounted to a stud in any way, shape, or form. We discovered this when the whole bloody enterprise collapsed after we reorganized. One of the nice things about living the way we do and moving so often is that we can really pare down what we need and take with us. Because we *clearly* need to downsize again, on this go-around we’re donating a ton of bedding, clothing, and my wedding dress to various consignment and Goodwill shops.
On the one hand, I’m sentimental about my dress. On the other, I haven’t looked at it since I got married 2.5 years ago and we certainly made no fuss about Tom’s rental tux, so…donated. I feel better knowing that someone will be able to put it to use either for their special day or theater company or whatever, and if Maggie really wants to see it we have photos. My mother’s wedding dress wasn’t kept and I never felt a sense of loss for not being able to see it in person. Maggie is her own person and I would never presume that she would a) want to have a traditional marriage and wedding in the first place, b) have the same body type as me, or c) not want to choose her own special dress according to her own tastes.
Besides, I’m not entirely sure that it’s real sentimentality about the dress or the fact that it was exponentially more expensive than the tux and therefore my frugal Yankee soul is scalded by the idea of giving it away. There’s really no use in getting sentimental about objects. Everything can break or be lost, ultimately you can’t take any of it with you, and the chances of your next-of-kin caring about something the way you did aren’t very high. Photos, letters, the family silver or crystal, jewelery, that sort of thing I understand. Things that carry tradition through their repeated use, or things given or made by family in order to be passed down. But a dress that’s worn once and then never again? Out the door.
And it feels nice to purge and be light; everything in our home fits in two 8’x8′ shipping containers, and that’s only because the couch needed its own container. That’s what we’ll try to teach Maggie as she grows: don’t buy it if you don’t need it, use it as much and as for as many purposes as you can, and if you don’t use it in 12+ months, sell or give it away if you can or trash it if you can’t. Onward!