A few random conversations around my house this week:

On the phone with my mother:
Mom: And what is Tom up to this afternoon?
Me: Watching zombie movies and baking almond pound cake.
Mom: …What?

Tom: I hate those stupid cover CDs that Rod Stewart did to make money on old people. So lame.
Me: Watch it, I think my Nana has a few of those CDs.
Tom: Nana is above the law. Her coolness is beyond reproach.

Me: So you were able to find a good discount deal for Maui over the holiday?
Tom: Yep! We’re going to have a very “Maui” Christmas.
Me: *stares*
Tom: Ha, I pun.

Me: Quick! The baby is kicking! Put your hand here, can you feel that?
Tom: No…
Me: Actually, it stopped as soon as you put your hand on my stomach.
Tom: Hey! Not nice, baby.
Me: I’m sorry the baby doesn’t like you. It’s just because it can’t see your ears yet.